Midnight Truffle

Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die.

The first thing that popped into my head when i read this.

For some reason, I really want to skydive.  I can barely jump off a diving board onto a blob (GENEVA), so I have no idea how i'll work up to this.... and i'm sure my mother is having a heart attack right now.  But maybe someday.

So...Two weeks before summer. I'm not sure if anyone could be more excited than me... I am SO freakin ready to get out of here! And not just because there was a freak snow storm up here this past week...wtf Iowa. I'm tired of this schedule I'm in. I rarely have convenient times to practice, which sometimes leads to me not practicing, leading to my face hurting next time i do, etc... But I just need something new to do. New places to go, and time to actually relax. Without having anyone to hang out with, anywhere to be, and anything to have prepared by a certain time.

Don't get me wrong. I'll be practicing my butt off this summer, because I am absolutely desperate to get into Wind Symphony.  Lord knows I'm going to have enough time... Kristen is leaving for the ENTIRE summer, so no Star Trek parties :( I hate to say it, but there's really not that many people I hang out with at home anymore. Not to mention everyone will be doing job things, and planning for college, etc. Summer will be interesting. And probably will be from here on out, for many reasons.


I'm home! I came home this weekend because:
A) I love Easter!!!!!
B) I need a break from school, and everything with it
C) My body hates me.


So here I am, watching Prince of Persia with mi madre, watching a cardinal keep flying back to the bird feeder outside the living room window, and blogging about nothing. And recovering from getting my 4 months-and-going wisdom tooth problem taken care of. I love laughing gas...so so much.  I wondered today, in my laughing gas induced state...What would happen if we shot bombs of laughing gas all over the world? I would get a huge kick out of that. :D


It's been a while since I last wrote anything... Not much has happened. Finals are coming closer and closer, everyone is getting more stressed, practice rooms are filled at every moment, and students of Dr Washut are crying more frequently. 
Ok, maybe that's just me. 
I also had a birthday! I am now the hugely unimportant age of 19. WOOOO. I got a PILLOW PET and Sims3 from my parents, among various other things that I hugely appreciate (such as a large cake...bloohgohggo). Hearing "Happy birthday!" so many times throughout the day (as well as seeing it on facebook) was entertaining. And it made me very, very happy. It made me realize how blessed I am to know so many amazing people, and for getting to know all the new and fantastically talented people up in Cedar Falls. I can't wait to spend the next few years with all of them. :)


Enough verbal ADHD. I have no central focus to this point, i just wanted to get a lot of stuff out. Time to go make a new Sims family :)

Best. Mood. EVER.

Day 14: A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without

A dog counts as "Someone" right? In my world it does.

This is Lucy. I love her, and I know she loves me.  She shows me what unconditional love is. 

If you think that's stupid, you probably dont own a dog.

Fun Fact: There are certain personalities I can't handle for more than a few hours a day.

Even more fun: The time limit gets shorter as I get more irritated.

I've met very few people that I can handle being around for extended periods of time..I realize that most of that is probably my fault, but I'm pretty sure other people are like this too. I don't do pity parties, or talking about a single topic (or person) day after day, gossip makes me feel like a terrible person, and constant cussing is kind of overkill. 

I dont really like the idea of someone being sad because of something i did, or mad because i said something, so the fact that i get tired of being around people sometimes is not really known. (until now, if you're reading this.)

So, I'm sorry in advance. And I'm sorry for the people who already have to deal with it. I try not to let it show, but sometimes I cant help it.

On a side note...I'm almost 19. I think, compared to most people I've been around recently anyway, I get more enjoyment out of things like birthdays, or Easter, or the dumb little things that bring back old memories. I can't explain it, and I dont care that it may make me seem a little childish sometimes... I dont really see anything wrong with it! :P
Because right now, I've got:
 a red Gerber daisy in a vase thanks to some amazing friends I miss a lot.
A pillow pet sitting on my bed, bein cute.
Sims 3 downloading in my computer AS I TYPE THIS.
A new (used) bike for ragbrai this summer
Cake sitting on the corner of my desk
A big dumb smile on my face because of everything that's happened today
Best. Mood. Ever.

I have the best parents, the best friends, the best boyfriend, and the best support system in the world.  In MY world. I couldn't ask for anything more.

Except better grades in Sight Singing and Aural Training...but that's getting back to reality.
Time for Sims :]

You'll be in My Heart

Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist.

I dont have a favorite band or artist! I like listening to a lot of different music, but i cant listen to a specific person or band consistently. I get tired of it! Favorites right now would be Adele, Muse, Ingrid Michaelson, Jimmy Eat World (a little), and Disney music. I like listening to things that have a variety of chord changes/CREATIVITY, so Jbiebz/rap/current music is not allowed. Otherwise, everything's fine.

Like I've said before, I cant deal with conflicts. Of any kind. Luckily, this past week has been full of them! A few were personal things not worthy of telling to the mass public, but one big one, involving the one and only robin guy...oh man. That's worth describing, i'd say.  So...I am one of the select few who gets to enjoy two days a week of Dr Guy. She's supposed to teach us piano, in a slightly more advanced way, but recently she's been doing crazy things like being anywhere from 5 to 20 minutes late, and even forgetting us entirely. Not to mention that we're about a month behind other piano classes in technique. So this last wednesday, we were all sitting outside our classroom, waiting...12pm comes, then 12:10, then 12:15... Just to check, we called her office.

SHE PICKED UP.

A few people stormed the fortress, and it turns out she's forgotten about us. Not the first time, either. Close to the end of our impromptu class, she's telling us how it's unacceptable that "none" of us are listening to her, and Vinny (Bless his untimely heart) raised his hand and told her it's unacceptable that she forgets about us and is consistently late.  So basically, she broke into a rampage, telling us how she's the busiest person in the school of music, it's not her fault she cant say no to anyone who wants her to accompany them (except it is..?) and that she is 57 and deserves a break. I stared down my piano book through this entire thing.  I admit, I'm a coward. 

So tomorrow's our next class. I'm terrified. 

On the other hand, I got little plants from Targhetto last weekend, and they're already growing! I got little baby sunflowers, zinnias, and coneflowers. Here's the count...

Zinnia: 4 babies

Sunflower: 2 BIG babies

Coneflower (Teemo): 1 new baby (as of this morning!!!)

Needless to say, i now have a new pail with daisies growing in them, and two new things to transfer my little flowers into. 

I love plants :) :) 

This past week was a bit crazy...but i have a feeling the next 5 weeks are going to be crazy as well. In the next 3 weeks alone, i have 11 recital/concerts to go to, as well as a birthday, and sanity to try and maintain. Just to prepare, i bought a fuzzy poster thing to color, as well as a random ladybug to paint. The Target dollar section is Godsent...and yes, maybe I am still a kid at heart. Problem?

For anyone who loves Disney like me :)

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2cIIc7/8tracks.com/thefleishman/judgement-free-zone-cough-disney

Heartache Tonight..

Day 12 - A picture of something you love.

I miss everything about her. All the time.

It just hit me.

Twisty

Day 11 - A picture of something you hate

I couldnt think of anything else I dislike more. Tornadoes scare me to death! Ever since watching Twister...which I'm still not totally comfortable watching, even now. And here we are, coming into prime tornado season...Great.  Let's see how many dreams of tornadoes I get this time.

Today is not a deep day.

It's dark, cold and misting outside.

There's a funeral,

For someone i didnt know well, until a few weeks ago.

Life can be short, and that's scary. 

Rest in Peace, Anna. 

Catch a Grenade

Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most messed up things with.

Oh hey! BT+MT+LT4EVR.

The lovely ladies of the unnamed quartet.  Dr McCandless had NO idea what she was getting herself into when she put us together...and neither did we! I love being around these guys.  Singing "soul" songs on walks from the GBPAC to Russell, theory victories (and upsets..), pep band and much more.  And somehow, we were all only mere feet away from each other during all state. Irony?  These girls are crazy, and I am so lucky to have them in my life. And my quartet :) Asian Drinking Song, anyone?

So here I am... sitting in the middle of Spring break. A week I've been looking forward to since the beginning of the semester. Not because I'm going somewhere warm and getting schwasted like half of the world, but because I wouldn't have something to do every. single. moment. of the day.  

And I get to this week, to my house.

And I'm absolutely bored. 

Don't get me wrong, it's not my family that's boring me. That's not the case at all. Sure my lil Tivo doesn't ever talk to me, and my parents both work all day. But i love being here anyway, and I honestly feel bad leaving them to hang out with friends. Or a boy. 

Not having anything to do....sucks. I haven't even taken Lucy on a walk.. She probably thinks I hate her. 

Oh God...I'm going to play with her all day tomorrow now. 

Anyway! My room has been invaded by a large Elliptical machine (which is now acting as a towel dryer), my stuff is all semi packed for when I leave Thursday, and this new guilt for not having played with my best dog friend is invading my heart.  And all I think of as I sit here is that I'm a terrible person, and a terrible music student. And I would go pick up my clarinet and practice, I would go hang out with Lucy and walk with her, but it's 10:15 at night. 

Maybe I'll go anyway. Who knows.

I've hung out with the people I've always hung out with since I've been here. It's almost like old times. Everyone's telling stories, laughing loud enough in a restaurant to make people give looks, reminiscing on choir, band, awkward children. Except it feels like everyone's holding something back.  Some aspect of their stories, something someone did or said at everyone's respective college. I know I held back. All of us have new people to introduce in stories, new things to explain and new adventures to tell about. It gets strange. Knowing that these people, whose lives you were previously so involved in, are different, have different friends, and are ultimately going separate ways. It happens, right? I don't want it to. But I think it's happening anyway. At least, if not for them, it is between ME and them. And I don't know why. 

I used to be able to tell them everything..Now I don't tell anyone.

Being home is good. I missed my family. I missed my dogs and cats. It still feels normal to me, and it feels like I shouldn't go back to CF. There's a lot of comfort in being here, even when everything and everyone has changed. 

Oh Hey

Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.

Mi madre.  I'm her little clone, according to everyone who knows her that I've ever met, but that's beside the point.  I love my moooom.  She's a nurse, so she's always been super caring and relaxed.  I've rarely seen her yell or get upset, and when she does....it's nothing to be scared of! Being mean is not possible for her, and I love it.  Not because I'm a terrible child and take advantage or anything (at least, I dont think so). I'm pretty lucky to have the set of parents that I have. :) 

Hmm..What to ramble about. Family has been on my mind a lot lately, and I'm not sure exactly why. Probably because I'm about to see them for the first time in almost 3 months...No big deal. And I've done some creeping on various people that have been involved with my family recently as well. Again, I don't know why. For instance, today I looked up one of my sister's exes who was....let's go with less charming than the others. A little sketchy, from the very beginning. At least, that's what my dad says! Anyway, I don't blame Niki for any of it... She's one of those people who can't help but want to take care of people. Break through her seemingly tough shell, and she's very caring. And very strange (in a good way). So my point, as I'm rambling, is that this guy turned out to be completely different than any of us thought, and did nothing but hurt people and twist words. Ending him in jail, and Niki basically restarting her life. It was a lot of pain for my family, but somehow we got through. Sure, my dad gets mad at Niki sometimes still, but I know now that it's absolutely only because he cares. He's a big softy, it just takes some time..  I don't know. I may get some disapproving comments for even posting this vague description of my family's inner drama, but it's something I still haven't completely dealt with, in my mind.  So i guess this is me, trying to work things through.  One thing I'm glad for is that somehow, it brought me and my sister closer.  Good things happen through all the bad things, right?

To make up for my last post being very long, and very rambly, I will end with a list of good things that have happened...

-Picking up my dad's old clarinet when I was a lil 5th grader

-Good grades when I was expecting failure

-Getting a paper sent to the author of the book it was about :)

-Spring Break!

-All State '08 and '09!

-Naked parties at Biscotti's (Naked in general...)

-Finding New Hope

-Having time to just go outside and walk around... Winter weather, please go away?

-Finding friends, losing touch with old ones... It's all for a reason.

-Realizing that no matter what, life is never as bad as you think

Here we go.

<3